Year One: Joker's Pet
He raised his wrist to his mouth and spoke into something there and suddenly
there were men repelling off of the top of the building and landing all around
me. I took up a martial arts posture and began to cycle through my favorite
moves. These guys seemed dumbfounded. I think they were expecting a completely
different fighting style. I put my fist into the nose of one, chopped the
windpipe of another, kneecapped a third. Everything was going perfectly; these
guys had trained for perhaps batman or robin and their fighting styles, because
I know I’m not typically good enough to take out a dozen men, but things were
working perfectly! It was the surprise element I brought to this that was
hurting them. One fired a stun gun and the pellet struck the thug next to me and
shocked him to the ground. I used the momentum of another thug to drive his own
head through the rungs of a railing. Then when another thug fired a line at me I
stepped aside and it wrapped around the railing. This jolt of electricity
shocked the man kneeling there with his head stuck between the bars. Another
finally broke down and obviously changed his method of attack and likely
whatever orders he’d been given, by firing a regular round at me, which struck
me in the arm, sending a ripple of pain through my body. I collapsed in pain and
lay there a moment. He approached me and that gave me enough time to recover
from the pain. I was unwounded and the pain was ebbing. When he got close
enough, I held the spot as if still wounded, but then I swept his legs and then
brought my heel down on his throat as he lay there.
When the dust cleared the crowd of onlookers was far back from the fight and the
police were in position but still seemed dumbfounded about what to do about the
Joker. I raised a hand and motioned to the crown prince of crime to come on out
and join me. He seemed beside himself. He glared at the prisoner beside him and
backhanded her across the gag sending her head spinning. Then I saw it coming.
From the distance the crowd was parting. They seemed to be making way for
something large. Joker finally turned that way when he heard the crowd quieting.
Then the batmobile broke from the crowd and slammed into the side of the Joker’s
vehicle, sending him off-balance and tipping the entire wagon over. There was a
moment where I couldn’t see anything happening due to the angle of the two
vehicles and I took advantage of that to swing across the street and take out
two thugs who had risen and attempted to flee. Fortunately there was a good
supply of cuffs in the utility belt. No wonder she and batman loved these
things.
As I glanced back, Batgirl was emerging from the bulletproof chamber and jumped
down onto the hood of the batmobile. As I’d expected, the Joker had made good on
his escape route, vanishing without a trace. The batmobile’s top sealed
concealing batgirl, then the vehicle whirled around and departed through the
crowd. And I was alone. The crowd cheered and I took one moment to wave to the
crowd then fled by the route I thought might be too difficult to follow me.
Two blocks away, the limo pulled up beside me.
“Good show, Miss. Well done.”
“Thank you, Mr. Pennyworth. I probably need to change back now.”
“Of course. Please,” he said as he got out and opened the back door for me. “Can
I drive you somewhere?”
I directed him to a common landmark from which I could reach my home with little
effort.
“The Joker escaped, unfortunately,” I said to him through the intercom in back
after changing my clothes.
“It’s quite alright. We found a holographic projector in the box. Batgirl knew
but couldn’t relate to us that the joker was never there to begin with. He was
in no danger.”
“I suppose I shouldn’t ask who ‘we’ is, should I?”
There was a pause.
“I think you know.”
I couldn’t help but smile, because I think I did know. And he thought enough of
me, or his friend here did, to seek my help.
As I departed the car, he thanked me again and then drove away. I walked a
couple of blocks to an alley where I’d stashed my change of clothing and waited
a few minutes to see that no one wandered in before I changed back to my
civilian clothing.
An insect bit me on the back of my neck and I reached up to brush it away, only
to discover that it was no insect. I pulled it from my skin and found it was a
green dart. The alley began to spin. I stumbled a few feet before I caught
another one in the soft spot in the back of my knee. After that, ground met jaw,
and I could see a distant van open at the end of the alley and a parade of
figures like those I’d fought at city hall all charged my way. But I was out
before the got there.
“Such a clever girl.” Joker said. I’d have known the voice even if I’d never
heard it before. “Are you a new protégé of the batwhore? You had me fooled.
Though nobody fools quite like a fool! Open your eyes, bat-duplicate, we should
properly meet.
There was no use putting it off. I opened my eyes.
“Allow me to introduce myself. I am the clown prince of crime. And you are?”
Truth was that I had three or four names in my head. But they all seemed so
trite. I knew that the moment would eventually come when I had to declare my
proud superhero name, and here it was. But none of the names felt right. So the
first one I could think of popped out.
“Bulletproof girl.”
“Reeeeally. I use your glass all of the time. HAAhahahaHAHAHhahaha.”
When he finished laughing he motioned to two of his stooges and they raised me
up. I was just beginning to understand where I was. I was suspended in some kind
of X-shaped frame framework. It was suspended at the center on some kind of
swivel and I was facing mostly downward at about a 75 degree angle to the
ground, but with a click of a button I was brought back to a full upright
position.
“Are you really bullet proof? That’s amazing.” He strolled up to me and stood
face to face with me, something that I couldn’t normally do if I weren’t
suspended. He held out his hand and one of his men slapped a marker into it. He
shouted “Cap!”
One of the men removed the cap and he proceeded to draw a bullseye on my
stomach, leaving the navel as dead center. He held up his hand an a man replaced
the marker with a pistol with an extremely long barrel.
“Wanna bet there’s not a banner in here that says ‘Bang’? Hehehe.”
He stood back, took aim, and let loose a single shot. The bullet struck me dead
center in the bellybutton and I let out a howl of pain. He strolled up to me,
grinning ridiculously, and reached down, caressing my stomach, then with a tiny
effort, I heard a small pop! He held the bullet up to my face.
“Look what I found in your navel. You’ve been getting too much iron! HAhahahahaA!”
He then took a step back and ordered, “Fifteen degrees.” The men turned the
crank and I was now nearly parallel to the ground. Then the two men left. And it
was just me and the Joker.
“You, my dear, will be very entertaining. Each night I return home from my fight
with the Batman with a hankering to kick a dog or shoot something. Now I have
just that! You can be either one, your choice. HooHooHooHooHoooo.”
“Who will feed me when Batman carts you off to Arkham again!”
“My, what a dirty mouth you have for such a young girl. You said two bad words
in that sentence. We don’t use the B word or the A word around here. I’m going
to have to wash your mouth out with something.
His back was to me and he seemed to be pulling something from his pocket, but
not what I expected. When he turned around he had opened the front of his pants
and let them drop to the floor.
“I’ve got a secret for you, my dear. The accident I had so long ago that left my
pale and puny… did not leave me puny everywhere.”
As I watched in horror, his penis began to grow. And grow. And GROW! AND GROW!!
The more shocked I got the bigger it grew, as if the look on my face were enough
stimulation.
“It knows you’re afraid,” Joker said.
“You can’t be serious about this!”
“My dear,” He said as he came closer, pulling a feather from the jacket of his
lapel. The horrible, huge penis was inches from my face. “I can’t be serious
about ANYTHING!” He then began to tickle my back and down toward my buttock,
reaching overtop of me. I resisted the sensation, and kept my mind off the thing
that was now occasionally bumping into my face.
“Not working, eh? Well, then I’ll just have to find another hole. A smaller
hole; one that will force your mouth open regardless.”
“Please do—”
Before I could finish my plea, it was forced in between my lips with enough
force to bump the back of my throat. I gagged involuntarily and tried to pull my
head back by the restraints and my position forbid it.
“Oh yes, dear. That’s the spot. Move those tonsils.”
I continued to gag and try to withdraw, to no effect. Now I was beginning to
panic, but he held my hair and laughed, warning, “If I feel any teeth on it I’ll
have them removed and we’ll try this again.”
That stopped the thoughts I was having about biting the thing off. Instead, I
had to remain there, speared like a fish with a hook in it’s mouth, writhing and
trying to dislodge myself. His hips barely moved, but then they didn’t have to.
My throat was involuntarily doing the work he wanted. Finally I felt his grip on
my head tighten. And his pelvis gave a few quick thrusts.
“Oooh. Hoooh. HOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOH!”
And something hot and damp splashed against the back of my throat, and I
continued to gag, tears running down my face while he slumped forward and rested
on atop my back. I had to wait until it went totally flaccid before it fell out
of my mouth and I could lower my head.
“Oh, it’s been so long since Harley was sent up. Until I get her back, we’ll be
doing more of this. Your tonsils are very talented.”
He walked away, leaving me suspended there. Sometime later one of the other men
came in and adjusted the angle so that I was no longer face down. Before leaving
he paused a moment to grope my breasts but left reluctantly while I hung there
in the dark and awaited my next fate.
Year One: Just Desserts “HooHoo! I got her a present! Look!” |
Year One: Stunt Double “I need your help. More importantly, a Hero needs your help.” |